The Catherine Tate Show - Bond Boy

The Catherine Tate Show - Internet Love

The Catherine Tate Show - Nan and the Ghost of Christmas Present

Ghost busters theme song and the Ghost of Christmas Present (David Tennant) appears.

Ghost:Makes me laugh every time! Hello? Ghost of Christmas Present.

Nan: That's all I need, a Scotch ghost with a comedy ringtone.

Ghost: Oh hiya. No I'm just in the middle of a wee job, can I call you back? OK, lets get started! Now have you got any of those porcini mushrooms? Cause I see you have a wee tin of the button variety but they've not got the same zip.

Nan: Give me strength!

Ghost: I've got a wee risotto on the go, I don't think we should travel on an empty stomach. So? Porcini mushrooms?

Nan: Yes love, they'll be in my fridge, next to my Chinese water spinach.

Ghost: Fantastic, I don't see any Chinese water spinach?

Nan: No darling? Oh, you know what they've probably fallen down by my Goji berries.

Ghost: No, I can't seem to find anything.

Nan: No? I can't help you then love.

Ghost: Are you sure they are in there?

Nan: Of course, they're not! What's the matter with you What do you think this is? Saturday Kitchen?

Ghost: Oh, I love that show, James Martin, don't get me started!

Nan: Well, it's just as well he can cook, cause he dances like he's shit himself.

Ghost: I'm sorry but his cha-cha-cha was a triumph!

Nan: What do you know about it? You're a ghost, and not much of one by the looks of you.

Ghost: What's wrong with the way I look? This is Giorgio Armani!

Nan: I don't care if it's George at Asda! That aint what a ghost's supposed to wear!

Ghost: I'm the ghost of Christmas present, I'm up to the minute! Constantly changing. Ever evolving, yet always on trend! Unstructured, yet tailored, clean lines, sharp sillouette but with a whiff of the shambolic rockstar! Do not criticise the clobber!

Nan: You couldn't be bothered, could you? Nah, that other fella I had here before, oh smashing he was! Yeah he looked the part! Was all done up in his costume, lovely pale face and what a stench! He stank like a rancid old arse! Whereas you,,, you smell like? God what is that?

Ghost: That's Paul Smith Summer!

Nan: You're very effeminate for a ghost!

Ghost: Hey, Don't play your games with me Joany Taylor! Alright! You think your snide wee remarks are going to get a rise out of me you've another thing coming! It's wake up time, OK? Because the things I'm going to show you tonight will leave you horrified by what you've become! And just for the record, there is nothing effeminate about me! OK?

*TIMER PINGS*

Ohh RISOTTO RISOTTO RISOTTO!!! I've burnt it!

Nan: Yeah, well, risottos are notoriously difficult to time.

Ghost: Joany!

Nan: Yeah alright, keep your skinny jeans on! This ain't my kitchen!

The Catherine Tate Show - Nan and the Ghost of Christmas Past

Nan gets a visit from the ghost of Christmas past and questions his credentials.

Catherine Tate - Complaining about international food

Janice and Ray are a couple from Beverley, East Yorkshire who express their disgust at the various signs of multi-culturalism in their very British circle. Sources of outrage include restaurant meals, due to their perception of over-pricing or the exotic nature of the food such as grapes in a brie cheese sandwich. They perceive global foods as adulterated British fare and view such culinary transgressions as personal assaults - finally responding with their catchphrase "The dirty bastards!"

Northern moaners Janice and Ray complaining about gazpacho with croutons ("It's cold tomato soup with tiny bits of stale bread") served at a wedding reception in Pudsey.

The northern moaners compaining about being served sushi. "This is in Nagasaki! The dirty, evil, raw fish guzzling bastards!"

And French sandwiches with no bread.

Catherine Tate - The Tired Mother

Catherine Tate - The working mother

Angie Barker, Working Mother - The Catherine Tate Show

Catherine Tate - Nan on Christmas Day

The Catherine Tate Show: Bernie - Hypnosis

The Catherine Tate Show - Valley Girl

This episode of the Catherine Tate show divulges the outcome of what happens when a valley girl gets offered a drink in a bar.

Catherine Tate - Woman of many talents

The Catherine Tate Show - The Aga Saga woman

An Aga Saga is a kind of novel about the lives of middle-class women living in British country villages. The name comes from Aga, a type of oven that these women would typically own.

Catherine Tate plays Mrs Montgomery, an upper class English woman who goes into a state of shock in various, seemingly harmless, situations. For example, in Series 1 she receives a phone call from her husband's business associate and has to tell her children that "daddy hasn't been able to find any good brie" on his business trip to France. They fear that the other children will make fun of them at the Parisian picnic at school because they don't have the right cheese.

In Series 2, the Aga Saga woman goes into a state of shocked terror when a Northern nanny has to look after her children. She does forewarn the children that the agency arranged for a temporary nanny (as Alice was ill), and that she feared that the nanny may come from as far north as Sunderland.

A Geordie is a person from Newcastle in the north of the UK.

A standard Aga oven

Catherine Tate - Chocolate Fudge Cake

Click on the image below to see the script:

Catherine Tate - Lauren Cooper at school

Lauren Cooper is a fictional character in The Catherine Tate Show. She is a comprehensive school student with a surly attitude and was most widely known for her phrase "Am I bovvered?" (i.e. bothered - the "v" in the word takes the place of the "th" that should be there). When feeling angry or embarrassed, she frequently replies with defensive responses such as "Am I bovvered?", "Do I look bovvered?" or "Are you disrespecting me?", among others.

Both the physical appearance and the behaviour of Lauren and her friends are mock stereotypes of the Chav subculture. If you don't know what chav means, look it up here: http://self-learning-eoicoruna.blogspot.com/2008/10/word-of-week-27-october-2-november-2008.html

Despite Lauren's blatant disregard for authority, and chav-like demeanour, she sometimes shows surprising intelligence. She is well-versed in the Periodic Table, she apparently knows Shakespeare and she is fluent in French (once surprising her French teacher by asking her "Regardez mon visage. Suis-je bovvered? Est-ce que vous appelez ma mère une Pikey?"), although she refuses to speak it for an oral exam.

In 2006 Tate's catchphrase "bovvered" was named Word of the Year and was poised to enter the Oxford English Dictionary. A spokesperson for the OED commented: 'Am I bovvered?' and its follow-up, 'Does my face look bovvered?' had already come to be seen as the perfect expression of a generation of teenagers and their speaking style."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/blog/2006/oct/12/bovveredwinsw1

Some notes to help you understand the two sketches:

French teacher



English teacher